What a concept!
You know how you can hear the same thing over and over and over again and then one time you hear it and suddenly you really hear it? You understand it? That happened to me today.
Someone made the point that if they stop focusing on themselves and instead focus on doing the best they can to help other people around them then they will be taken care of without even having to worry about it. Thunderstrike!
In these weeks following “The Break-Up of 2013” I’ve been
fairly extremely self-focused. Somewhat necessarily so, since I’m suddenly searching for a new job. Every day I’m extolling my own virtues in cover letters to prospective employers. Enthusiastic! and Fast learner! Mad skills! I’m awesome…I swear!
But–less necessary–I do catch myself trapped in thoughts like:
“What is the plan for me?”
“WillI I be able to get a good job so I can support Callie?”
“Am I going to be alone forever?”
“Haven’t I had enough of the life lessons for crissake?” (For real though, Universe/God/Higher Power. I get it. I’m humbled. Please move on to someone else.)
Thankfully I have good friends and my own personal spiritual path that I can lean on to keep me on the positive side of things and looking forward. That’s all good.
But today I really started thinking about how sweet life would be if I just put my energy into being the best I can be for everyone I come into contact with.
If I do everything I can to make Callie feel loved and taken care of and even disciplined–which I do a pretty good job of, I think–then I’ve done my job and I don’t need to guilt-out about her being an “Only Child of Divorced Parents” or wonder if I’m doing it all right. It’ll be fine.
If I work as hard as I can for my employer–whoever that turns out to be–and focus on making their business as successful as possible, then my career will naturally advance the way I want it to.
If I think of what my sister or brother might need, or how I can help my parents, or see how my friends are doing, I forget to think about myself. And I’m much happier as a sweet little side-effect.
I heard business advice from someone once. (Okay, I probably heard it way more than once, but one time it stuck.) It was: “Try not to talk about yourself at all for a whole day and see how that goes.” I’m going to try that today. As long as I don’t have a job interview. I’m pretty sure that wouldn’t go over too well. But it would be memorable!
P.S. Is it ironic that I just wrote an entire blog post about me not thinking about myself?
HA! I might still have some more work to do…